almost a year ago

I am horrible at this. It has nearly been a year since I have last updated this. I kept meaning to come on here and write, but I would forget or something, obviously.
A lot has happened in this short year. I hope your ready for a dump of updates today.

We tried and succeeded in becoming pregnant with a boy! He was born the 8th of October. I now have   a 3.5 year old, 2 year old and a 4 wk old. Life sure has gotten more exciting for me. Its funny I didn't realize that the adjustment from 2 to 3 children was going to be so difficult, at least for me. I don't remember it being such a struggle from 1 to 2 children. It is the most overwhelming when I try and go grocery shopping with all three. I can't have one in the basket while the other is walking. I now have two walking and so it is too crazy trying to keep two children by you with out picking up or getting into the merchandise, or without yelling while running around the basket, or worse someone else's basket. I have not succeeded yet, instead I just left and went home. This will get better I hope.

Other things that have happened. Jamie, my sister moved up to Norton, Ks. She moved up her to be the secretary at the church and to help with the children department. It has been fun and very helpful having my sister around. It has been awhile that I have lived in a place with family. I think it has been a harder adjustment for her though. Norton, although a fantastic town with amazing people, is a very small town with little to no shopping. But I am sure thankful for her being here.

It has been a great year.

Micaiah James

We tried and prayed that we would have a boy. Every time I thought about it I would pray for a boy. Paul and I also changed our diet and other things we had researched to help conceive a boy. (I hope this is not too much information.) When our ultrasound came up and we could find out the gender, we were very excited and nerves to find out what we would have. The Dr. looked the baby over and said with uncertainty that he thinks its a boy but isn't for sure. So he left and got the tech to come in and verify. In the mean time, baby adjusted so when she put the doppler back on my tummy he was willing to show us who he is.
"Oh, yup, it a boy! Congratulations, you having a boy!" She said with great confidence. Paul and I were over joyed. We kept staring at the ultra sound pic, the proof that it's a boy. Although we love having our girls and would have been in love with another girl, we were very much hoping and praying for a boy. On my side of the family boys are rear. My grandmother, my mom's mom, has not had a boy born to her. She has two beautiful daughters who have had all beautiful daughters and up until now, the grandchildren had had all beautiful girls.
To spread the news to the grandparents we ordered four blue flowers to be sent to each of the grandparents at work with a note that said "its a boy." Oh what fun it was to receive their phone calls.
This brought a whole new level of excitement to me in being pregnant with a boy. I was on cloud 9 most of my pregnancy. I felt bad in the fact that I didn't enjoy Eden's pregnancy as much as I was enjoying this one, it felt like the first time when I was pregnant with Haddie. Poor Eden, I was not wanting to be pregnant yet, and so I didn't handle that pregnancy very well at all. But, like my other two pregnancies, everything went very smoothly. I didn't get as sick as I did with the other two, but I did have a greater amount of fatigue. I had no complications or really any complaints. Even up to my due date, when I was wanting Micaiah to come and I was complaining over the little things just because I was still pregnant, I still didn't have any real complaints. I wasn't really hurting or anything, just tired of being pregnant. Which I am sure every mother gets to that point. I believe its God's gift in order to face the impending doom of labor. We get so exhausted from being pregnant that we are willing to face the horrors of labor just to not be pregnant anymore.
I was originally due the 5th of October, but somewhere along the pregnancy the Dr changed it to the 4th. So in my last two months of my pregnancy I kept hearing that the 4th was my due date. Seeing as I was on time with Haddie and a few days early with Eden, I was for sure I would be early with Micaiah.  We even scheduled Paul's parents to arrive the 6th of October, because we were so sure that the baby would be at least born by then. Well, my due date came and went, my other due date came and left, and my in-laws came and I was afraid they would have to leave without seeing Micaiah. Oh, I was getting so impatient.

Here is my Labor story:

I had been having false labor for several weeks leading up to the point of final labor. It was getting rather annoying with how often I was getting these "false labors." I never went into the hospital for them, because I would wait them out and glad I did. The contractions would only get to a certain strength and then not get any stronger. They would also only get as close as 5 min apart and then stayed 5 min apart for several hrs before tapering off.
Well, on Monday the 8th, I wake up in the middle of the night to contractions. I got excited, they were coming about every 20 min. But then I had one at 7:30 and not again until 9:20. This was getting discouraging. We went to a Dr. appointment to get a stress test done and talk about the possibility of getting induced. I was not wanting to be induced, I do believe that it is best for the baby to wait until natural labor starts, but I was feeling the pressure from my husband and myself to have this baby while his parents were in town and they were to leave on Wednesday. Everything Checked out great, and I did have a contraction here and there, but nothing strong. Finally a little before 2 pm I have my first Strong contraction. I had a few more while Paul was getting ready to head back to the office. I ask him to please not go in as I think this is it. He decides to go get his computer so to work from home and left to be back soon. While he was gone I didn't have any and while talking to Haley I got discouraged. When just as Paul walks back in I had another strong contraction. They continue to get stronger and closer together. I labored at home on the exercise ball and by 3 pm Paul asks if I want to go in. I refuse wanting to labor as much as I can at home. But by 3:30, they are coming so strongly that I am ready to go to the hospital and am wanting an EPI. We leave to go to the hospital at 3:45. On the way to the car I have two more, making it difficult to get into the car. On our 5 min ride to the hospital I didn't have a single contraction. Frustrated, I want to wait in the car until I have one. Not a minute later I have a VERY strong contraction. We started heading in and I have one as we are walking in. We get to the Labor and Delivery and I am struggling to get the gown on because of how frequent and strong the contractions are. I finally get the gown on and the IV in. They check me and I am at a 5-6 which is two cm more then I was at my apt earlier that morning. The contractions get stronger and I have a feeling of needing to urinate with every contraction. Suddenly they were extremely strong. Like nothing I ever felt before. I could no longer handle them while on the ball. I couldn't handle them hardly at all. I was making Paul hold me up because I couldn't stand or sit through them, but I had to move. They were coming so frequently I felt like I didn't even have a break between them. Paul looked up at the nurse and asked, "When will the anesthesiologist be in?" The nurse answered while looking at my bag of fluids.
"He is in the next room and will be in soon."
With the next contraction I felt the weirdest feeling, my body began to push. When my body did it again with the next contraction I told the nurse, "feel pushy!" she quickly checked me and said I was at a 8-9 cm. Then the next contraction I felt that feeling even stronger. "I feel like I should push!" I screamed. She quickly called the Dr. in. They got me on the bed, which was not fun to contract on the bed. He checked me and said, "Oh, she still has time to get an EPI, she is at an 8. Do you want an EPI?"
"No." I said while squirming on the bed. "I can't sit still for one." I thought. Then the next contraction, I said I needed to push again. They told me to go ahead not believing I would do much. He checked me again and said, "Wow, okay, she moved him about a mile with that push, lets take this bed down, its time to get this baby out." After three pushes, which was the most intense pain I have EVER felt, at 4:53 pm Micaiah was born! Oh the joy to have him born! They laid him on my chest and I marveled at him. They then took him and placed him beside me to clean him up and check him over.
This is the part, I feel, that everyone, who delivered naturally, lies. They say once the baby is born you are overcome with such great joy your pain is gone. They LIE! I was in such pain, and I didn't even rip, yet it hurt sooo bad. I couldn't even enjoy them weighing, measuring, and checking Micaiah. I begged for help and until they finally got me Advil did I finally get relief. The nurse told me it was the pitocin they were pumping into me to get my uterus to shrink back down. I hate pitocin!
Once I was feeling better and nursing Micaiah, the nurse came in and said, "I have to tell you this. We do three different measurements of time. One from when we check and you are 5 cm until you are 10 cm, then from when you are 10 cm until you deliver the baby, and then from the delivery of the baby until you deliver the placenta. You went so quickly we had to measure them all together. From when we checked you at a 5 cm and until you delivered the placenta was only 37 min."
So, if it only last a total of 3 hrs and the most intense is only a few minutes, I can obviously deliver naturally. We were only at the hospital for one hour before I delivered Micaiah. It was a good thing we left when we did or I could have delivered the baby at home.
Although I don't want to ever have to go through that again. Thankfully he is our last to have biologically. It was quite the experience, and I an experience I am thankful to have had. If it were just for the respect I gained in Paul's eyes it was worth it! I also felt so close to Paul in those moments, he was such a huge support and encouragement. He gained 1050 points that day in my book. That made it worth it to me!

Snow!

I have always enjoyed snow. Better yet, I would say that I love snow.

When the opportunity came that we would be moving to Colorado, the home of snow (so I thought), I was really excited. Well, when we got there it did snow, but not as much as I expected.

Come on, every time I visited, there was huge amounts of snow. Enough to ski on and it stayed the whole week and even snowed at least 3 nights or more while we'd be there. No one told me (yes, they did, I just didn't believe them) that not all of colorado was like this. Evidently NOT, it did snow and I did enjoy it. But it melted very soon after. So we moved.

Yes, it wasn't enough, so we moved to Kansas, where there is more snow.

Wait, what?

Okay, not really...

For the last three weeks on Tuesday or Wednesday the weather forecast said snow.

Guess what? Nope, it didn't.

Well, it did one of those days but it didn't stick.

This morning however, with no expectations of snow being in the forecast I awoke to SNOW!!! it was quite the surprise! One inch of snow and it was still coming down.

Haddie was just as excited and kept telling Eden, "Look, its snow men!" (I think she meantsnowing, but she does get confused)

After about an hour and half I got the girls ready to play outside in the snow. By that time it had added anouther 2 inches! Haddie was so very excited and immediatly got to work on her snow man! She ate most of him, but with a little help he was created. Eden on the other hand was not so sure about this snow men (snowing). She was interested in eating it, but then her hands got cold and she did not like that.

after about 30 min of torture for Eden I decided it was probably time to let her go inside. However, Haddie thought it more of torture to make her come inside then for Eden to be outside. Haddie's hands where even red and freezing, but she didn't care. She wanted to play, dance, leap, and enjoy the snow. But for the sack of whinny Eden, who hardly had red hands and thought they were going to freeze off, I bribed Haddie with Hot

Chocolate.

At the sound of Hot Choco.... She rushed by me nearly nocking Eden over to get her hot chocolate. If there is one thing Haddie loves it's snow, if there is one thing Haddie loves a little more then snow it's anything chocolate.

YES, she is my daughter completely, and yes, I think its inherited.

I know I didn't teach her that.... okay maybe.

Once inside with Hot (slightly warmed) Chocolate both my girls were very happy campers.

It is snowing now with the sun shinning, *sigh, it is so beautiful!

Thank you God, for snow!

My birthday, and my amazing husband!

So Sunday morning was like any other Sunday for me and my family. Paul woke earlier and got ready and left with a sweet kiss. I soon got up with the girls and got them breakfast while I finished getting myself ready for church. After they were done I began to get the girls ready.

I told Haddie, "Today is my birthday!"

"Oh, it is?" she replied excitedly

"Yup"

"I sing to you! Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday for mommy..."

"oh Haddie that was beautiful, I love it!"

"Can I eat your Cake?"

"Yes, Haddie you can have some of my cake when we get some!" I answered through my laughter

We finished getting all ready and got into the car. Haddie continued to sing me the birthday song all the way to church. Mind you it is not very far.

Church was wonderful and good. After church paul quickly came to get me and brought me to the car. He told me to get in, confused I did. He then whisked me away, that is after I said goodbye to my girls, of whom one was worried she wouldn't get any cake with me going away. After assuring her we would get some when I got back, we left for Kearney, NE. (Kearney is an hour and half way. The closest larger town.)

There we went to the mall and I got to get some clothes, they were having a huge sale at Old Navy, just for me I am sure! Then we went to see a Movie, Money Ball is very good! After that fantastic movie we went to eat at Red Lobster! YUMMY! We then went to stay in a hotel for the night.

Paul had this all planned for me, he had my bags packed (all except for shoes), the girls a place to stay and to be taken care of, plus their bags (all except for shoes). It was a huge surprise and a wonderful treat. Paul is amazing and loves to do things like this for me, and I love it! Him too!

I was very surprised about the weekend. I had no idea. I knew it was going to be a busy weekend and did not know when we would be able to celebrate my birthday. I was not expecting this at all! It was so nice to get away without the girls and spend some good quality time with my hubby! I am truly blessed!

When we got back the girls were happy to see us. They were tired from all the fun they had, plus waking up extra earlier then usual, my apologies to Larry and Kathy. They usually sleep until 8, but being in a new place they awoke at 6:30 to the joy of the ones who were taking care of them.

We got to the house and I noticed that our pumpkins had been stolen!!! Yes, we went to a friends who had a small pumpkin patch and got several pumpkins, but yesterday someone stole all but three! How funny is that. It was wired that someone stole them in the first place, but even more so that they left 3 of them.

After noticing that they were stolen Haddie also noticed.

"Oh, no my pumpkins!' she exclaimed, It is amazing how much she pays attention to what we say and how much she understands! But she was very sad about the pumpkins!

There and Back again, a tale by a youth ministers wife

We have had quite the adventure in moving out to Norton. Let me tell you of the tale; There and Back again.

We were packed and ready to go. One of the few times that our family was prepared to leave at the time we said we wanted to leave by. Paul gives Mazie (our dog) some calming pills to help her on the long journey, while I got a movie ready for the girls to help them. We hoped into our cars and start our engines, except on problem mine wouldn’t start.

Great, well, so we thought we would be leaving on time…

Paul gets out the jumper cables and tries to jump it, but the cables are not making a connection. I say a little prayer, and sure in enough a friend and neighbor across the street comes to say goodbye and ends up helping us. He got the cables to work. The battery got a jump and the van started. Now we were on our way.

After picking up my mom who was going with us to help with the girls and getting some doughnuts we were finally, really, on our way. We went through the toll and found that someone had paid for however many cars to go through. Mom proclaimed, that was God blessing us on the journey.

Mom and I had a jolly good time. We talked and laughed and truly enjoyed each other. When Haddie got restless and began to have a fit. Nothing would consol her. Not Nana, not threats on her life, not even candy. I was being driven crazy by her fit when the van began to shake wildly. I was on the highway and not knowing what to do I slow down and got over to the slow going lane with my hazards on and called Paul over the walki-talkie to let him know I need to stop. We pull over at the next exit to take a look at the tires and under the hood. Everything seemed fine. We decided to go on to Cracker Barrel a few miles a head to stop and eat.

After we get back into the van we start on the highway again and it continued to shake, just not as bad. I slowed back down and got ready to stop, when the shacking just suddenly stopped.

The rest of the trip to Norton was event free, Haddie finally fell asleep and we had a peaceful trip.

Paul asked Larry if someone could take a look at the van because we needed to take it with us the next day to Canon City to pick up the rest of our stuff.

Thankfully someone did look at it, however he couldn’t find anything wrong and said that it could be something else something serious. So in good wisdom Paul decided to leave the van in Norton. Which meant that all five of us with our luggage and two car seats had to fit into the car. That would be fine and dandy, but the car seats take up much more room then just two little girls or even two adults. I was squished between the two car seats, having to sit sideways so I could fit for 6 hours.

At one point when we were all asleep Paul shouts, “Oh my, that guys dead!” This wakes mom and me with curiosity. While we were sleeping Paul was driving along side a man for some time when he passed Paul and was in the fast lane going probably 90. The driver then begins to drift. Hitting the guard in the road the man looked as if he tried to correct and over corrected sending his car into a flipping frenzy. Paul said he flipped several times before landing in the ditch. We of course stop immediately, but so did several others. After praying for the man, Paul decided to go on seeing as several had stopped and he had a car full with two little ones. Passing the wreck we saw how bad it was, it looked scary. I fearful reminder of how fragile life is. I prayed for us to have a safe arrival.

That shook Paul and he was awake as we drove into Denver. But I needed a break so we stopped at the new IKEA. That stores is amazing! It is huge! I love it. But I could not help but to sing the song from Veggie Tales in Madam Blue Berry, “Stuff Mart”. I really enjoyed going through there, it took us two hours and we made a huge wish list. But we made it out with only spending $10. Most of that was on the snack we had. Yes, their Swedish meat balls really are that good!

We got back in the car and began making our way. We only had 2 more hours until we were into Canon City. Oh, how the ride hurt. No, not just because I was squished between two car seats, but because this was a very familiar drive. One I’d take each time coming from the airport or when we were coming back from Denver having some family fun. It also was the very drive I took with the minister’s wife and youth sponsor when we first moved there just 21 months before. It hurt that we were now taking it to go pack and leave Colorado. A place I dreamed I would live in since I was a little girl and we would travel here for Family vacations. I finally got to live here, but now it was time to leave.

We got into Colorado Springs when I received a text from a friend in Canon City; worried because there had been a real bad wreck on HW 115 the HW we have to take from Springs to Canon City. When we passed it we saw how bad it was. Yet another reminder of how fragile life is. The cars had a front on collision; one of the cars had been crushed so bad that the front was in the backseat of the car. It was fatal we later found out. I again prayed for a safety in getting to Canon.

We did make it into Canon City alive.

I am thankful that my Dad and Paul had decided to go up two weeks before and do some packing. They practically packed up the whole house. There would have been no way we could have got it all done in the time we wanted to if it had not been for them. Basically all we had to do was load up the truck and clean up the house.

That whole week was very hard for me. I also had to say goodbye to my first house. I think it hurt even more because of the circumstances in why we had to move. If we were leaving just go to another ministry it would have been one thing, but we were leaving because they asked us to. That feeling of being unwanted swelled in my throat. But God is always so good, he was right there next to me reminding me that he wants me and that he has great plans for us in Norton.

The next day we began loading and only one guy, a very good friend of ours came to help us at first. This hurt because two others told Paul that they would be there, but one ended up having to work and the other just didn’t show. I had a hard time not being bitter because we had a ton of people who came to help us move in, but now we were left to ourselves to get it done. But in my pity there showed up a mother of one of the sons in the youth group. Her husband couldn’t come, but she could. She did it to say thank you for all that Paul had done for her son. Its amazing how God can pull you out of your self pity if you only trust him and see his many blessings.

Also while we were there we did get to see some good friends and enjoy a good-bye party given by some amazing friends of ours. It was nice, because we also got to see some of the kids in the youth again and hang with them. Haddie was able to see some of her friends that she too missed. It was so cute to see her so excited and running around with her little friends.

One little girl we didn’t get to see though. A girl Haddie loved dearly and I watched her every Tuesday for about a year. But the family was too busy and we were there only for a few days so we did not get to see her. I think I was more hurt then Haddie, even though she still talks about her.

During the night of the party, it got really cold and rainy and foggy. I was sort of spooky. We were all having fun enjoying each other when all of a sudden the lights went out. Ironic don’t you think, that on a foggy, cold, and rainy night that the lights go out. It scared my mother, because she was just about to let Haddie go down the stairs when it went out. My mom frantically grabs Eden and yells out for Haddie grabbing her before she fell down the stairs. The rest of the night was spent by candlelight, romantic huh…

The fog hung around all that next day. We left at about 11:00 to head back to Norton and there was still a fog. It got thicker and thicker as we left Canon, it was crazy because we were still driving in a thick fog at 2:00 in the afternoon. I was scared to death trying to follow Paul. The fog was so thick I could not see him 20 feet in front of me. Afraid I would hit him, I refused to go faster then 65mph. This made for a long trip. Even when we got on to I-70 there was still a thick fog for about another 30 miles. While on I-70 I got separated from Paul. Refusing to go faster then 65 I just stayed behind these group of motorist. But while following them this other moving truck with a trailer and truck attached behind it comes beside me trying to pass. It was going too fast to have a hitch. The truck that was on the back was bouncing back and forth on the road freaking me out. I finally slowed down to let it pass and then stayed a very good distance for fear that the hitch was going to come off from the swaying.

Finally the fog lifted and visibility was clear enough for me to speed up and catch back up with Paul. Luckily there were no more exciting events as we drove into Norton.

That is my tale of “There and Back Again”

I laugh now at the remark my mom made at the beginning of the trip. Although I still believe it, God did bless our trip, it just was an exciting one full of adventure! But what is an adventure with out adversity to overcome.

Moving to Norton

Wow, it has been a very long time since I have posted on here. A lot has happened in these few months. As you know from my last post Paul had lost his job in Canon City. We moved in with his parents awaiting our next adventure. We had an understanding that it could be a while before Paul would get a job back in the ministry so we were ready to get any job first available to us. Paul began putting his resume out there, really everywhere, but in Ministry. Paul wanted to take the month of July to pray about the situation and for healing. We were really hurt so we were not sure if we wanted to get right back into ministry. I even think I thought deep down inside, that no one would want us because we had been fired. But God had other planes.

One night Paul was talking to God about the situation. He was talking to God about the hurt and how maybe he doesn’t want to be in the ministry for a while. He asked God to be clear as to what he should do. He decided to put this out there; he wouldn’t look for a job in the ministry for the whole month of July, and if You (GOD) want me to be in ministry You’ll have to put it in my lap.

Paul continued his job search, when he landed on a job with selling insurance through Affleck. Paul was really enjoying the training and was dreaming up how fun it would be to work for them. He told me he thinks that he wants to pursue this for a while and take a rest from ministry. Hesitant, but I agreed knowing his hurt. He was in full fledge mode to learn and do well at this job.

That week he got an e-mail from a mentor and professor from College who knew about the situation. He mentioned this job that was available in a small town in Kansas, they were looking for a youth minister and gave us the contact info. I was not really interested finding out that it was 8 hours from Muskogee, but something within me made me think of it often and I asked Paul what he thought.

That is when he told me his agreement he had made with God. I asked him if he thought this was God putting it in his lap, Paul didn’t think so, just a kind e-mail from someone who cares and is trying to be helpful.

However, the next day he got another e-mail, this from the minister of that church asking for Paul’s resume. After talking it over he decided that he felt like this was God putting it in his lap. So he sent his resume. But still seemed resistant.

In the mean time Paul received yet, another e-mail from his professor of another job. But Paul was unsure of the location and didn’t pursue it.

I began praying for Paul because I could see the resistance he had in his heart towards being in the ministry again. He was very involved and excited about this job with Affleck, and it concerned me.

I want to be clear Paul was Genuinely excited about this job selling insurance. He was studying hard in training and getting ready to take the test that would license him to sell insurance. He was very dedicated and talked about it ALL the time.

I talked with Paul about his resistance toward getting into ministry and that he should pray about it. That he did. That night he talked to God about his excitement and dreams he had in selling insurance. How we would live in Muskogee and he would sell insurance so well that we would get out of debt and also get to live close to family. It could be dream come true. However, if this was not God’s plane for his life that he would have to change his heart and passion with this dream he has.

Low and behold God did just that. While at class Paul was listening and taking notes like a star pupil, when God directed his imagination back to youth ministry and Paul began daydreaming about what he would like to do and how he’d like to try some new things. Before he knew it he was far behind in class. Paul simply said, “Okay, God I get it.” He finished that day well, but was excited to get back to tell me what happened and of his renewed excitement for youth ministry.

The church in Kansas got back with us saying that they talked with all his references and would like for us to Skype with them. Still not really excited about the possibility of going so far, but having a deep feeling that this is the direction we should peruse, we accepted the offer.

During the Skype meeting Paul and I were very honest not wanting them to get any of the wrong impressions. After the meeting we were still confused as to what we should do, but were delighted by the feeling that they let off. We began praying very hard for Gods direction.

Not long after the Skype meeting they asked us to come out to Norton to take a look. Nervous and unsure, we decided to go. We both had a deep feeling that we were to continue to pursue this for whatever reason.

While we were there in for some reason I was the one who was resistant. Paul, one the other hand was excited and encouraged. Which was so good to see after seeing the hurt and pain he had just gone though and knowing the resistance/fear he had with going back into the ministry. However, No matter how much I felt like I didn’t want to be in Norton all those feelings would leave when I would get with the People. Such genuine, loving people, not sure what it was but I loved the people. But then I would get a lone and would get the feeling of dread.

It is a small town, with NO Wal-Mart. The closest Wal-Mart is an hour away in a whole other state! It was also 8 hours from home. I wanted to be closer and in a bigger town then 3,500! Paul suggested I talk to God about it, so I did. I told him how resistant I am to this. I told him how I wanted to be closer to home and how I want the comforts of home and of a bigger town. I told him how I don’t think I could do well, I would be lonely and alone. So if you want us to move, you are going to have to change my heart! That was Saturday.

Sunday came and we were meeting everyone, and in my heart I was thinking what kind, sweet people, but we will not be moving here. Then that night we went to youth Group, I don’t know when and how it happened but after that night I left Telling Paul, “Okay, I am excited. I think we should come here!”

Again, I don’t know how or when in the night it happened, but my heart changed. Although I was still not excited about moving 8 hours away from family and friends, nor was I excited to not have a Wal-Mart with in 60 miles of me. I knew this was where God wanted us to be.

On Monday before we started making our way back to Muskogee, we stopped by the church to see the minister. There he told us what we would expect in the next few weeks. They had been interviewing another person for the job and they would let us know if they still plan on bringing him out too, or if they would just offer us the job. We would know in a few days what they planned to do.

I was not worried, not one bit. I was sort of hopping that they would bring out the other guy, this way we would know without a doubt that if they still chose us. If they went with the other guy, no big deal, Paul still could pursue Affleck.

Two days later we got a call saying that they decided not to bring the other candidate out and that if we would like the job it was ours. We told them that we wanted a week to pray about it and we would get back to them.

Within that week we received yet another e-mail from a minster who had heard of Paul and would like for him to send his resume. Paul and I prayed over it and felt that we shouldn’t. We believe it was God reminding us that as long as we trust and follow him, he will still use us. Also, that He wants us even though Grandview didn’t.

After a week of praying and talking to those we trust, we nervously accepted the position.

Wow, is all I have to say. God is so very amazing and so very good. I am completely humbled by his goodness and provision. We were so hurt and scared by what happened at the end of June. But now we are comforted by the fact that we still matter and that God still has plans for us. That he worked so hard for us to get us a job in ministry. It is so amazing to me that God, the all powerful, creator has a plan and a purpose for me and my family, that he would take the time to move mountains or my and Paul’s heart to get us in a spot where he wants us.

We sent our application in the middle of July accepted the position in the middle of August. We lived with Paul’s parents for only 2 ½ months, when we thought there would be no way we could move out before 6 months at least. God blew me away! I believe through this, it was God saying to us that as long as we trust and follow Him, He will still use us. Also, that He wants us even though Grandview didn’t.

God's is sooo Good

When I found out, I was still in Muskogee. I was down stairs talking to Mom and Dad waiting for Tara to arrive so we can start hearing all about their vacation to Rome and the Mediterranean. Just as Tara was getting in the door, my phone rang. I hadn't heard much from Paul since he went back to Colorado just 2 days prier because his phone didn't get reception by the mountain wear we lived. So I quickly answered anxious to hear his voice. But his voice was not his usual. I ran upstairs so I could hear him better away from the noise of excitement down stairs. This is when he told me.

After getting off the phone I carried myself down stairs to tell the family. Sick and disbelief swept over me. Anger and tears welled inside. I was upset, I didn't understand, and I was confused as to why.

The next morning I awoke with this song, "Everlasting God" at the very forefront of my mind. I basically awoke singing it. "Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord,"

That day I met up with Paul and we were able to talk things over and get a plan in motion. But things were still very confusing.

Wednesday morning I work up singing these words "When you don't understand, when you can't see God's plane, trust his heart."

God continued to encourage me in this way because the next morning I work quoting Proverbs 3 "Trust in the LORD with all your Heart, lean not on your own understanding". I later that day went to look it up and saw how helpful that Proverbs 3:5-12 was.

Again God put a scripture on my mind when I awoke the Friday morning Philippians 4:4-7 "rejoice in the Lord always again I will say rejoice, let your gentleness be evident to all, for the Lord is near. Do not worry about anything but in everything, with prayer and petition, and thanksgiving offer your request to God, and the peace of God that paces all understanding will guide your hearts in Christ Jesus."

I would not have made it through so easily without these sweet reminders and encouragement from my God.

He was even faithful when I was weak. While we were white water rafting on Sunday I was thinking about the situation and was hurting when I looked up and written on the back of our guides safety pack was "the Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still" Exodus 14:14

I still don't agree with how and why things happened they way they did and why they did. But I am better in knowing that God has carried me through. He has reminded me daily of who he is and daily protected me from the evil ones lies. I am so thankful for his Care and protection. He is a great God who loves me very much.