Snow!

I have always enjoyed snow. Better yet, I would say that I love snow.

When the opportunity came that we would be moving to Colorado, the home of snow (so I thought), I was really excited. Well, when we got there it did snow, but not as much as I expected.

Come on, every time I visited, there was huge amounts of snow. Enough to ski on and it stayed the whole week and even snowed at least 3 nights or more while we'd be there. No one told me (yes, they did, I just didn't believe them) that not all of colorado was like this. Evidently NOT, it did snow and I did enjoy it. But it melted very soon after. So we moved.

Yes, it wasn't enough, so we moved to Kansas, where there is more snow.

Wait, what?

Okay, not really...

For the last three weeks on Tuesday or Wednesday the weather forecast said snow.

Guess what? Nope, it didn't.

Well, it did one of those days but it didn't stick.

This morning however, with no expectations of snow being in the forecast I awoke to SNOW!!! it was quite the surprise! One inch of snow and it was still coming down.

Haddie was just as excited and kept telling Eden, "Look, its snow men!" (I think she meantsnowing, but she does get confused)

After about an hour and half I got the girls ready to play outside in the snow. By that time it had added anouther 2 inches! Haddie was so very excited and immediatly got to work on her snow man! She ate most of him, but with a little help he was created. Eden on the other hand was not so sure about this snow men (snowing). She was interested in eating it, but then her hands got cold and she did not like that.

after about 30 min of torture for Eden I decided it was probably time to let her go inside. However, Haddie thought it more of torture to make her come inside then for Eden to be outside. Haddie's hands where even red and freezing, but she didn't care. She wanted to play, dance, leap, and enjoy the snow. But for the sack of whinny Eden, who hardly had red hands and thought they were going to freeze off, I bribed Haddie with Hot

Chocolate.

At the sound of Hot Choco.... She rushed by me nearly nocking Eden over to get her hot chocolate. If there is one thing Haddie loves it's snow, if there is one thing Haddie loves a little more then snow it's anything chocolate.

YES, she is my daughter completely, and yes, I think its inherited.

I know I didn't teach her that.... okay maybe.

Once inside with Hot (slightly warmed) Chocolate both my girls were very happy campers.

It is snowing now with the sun shinning, *sigh, it is so beautiful!

Thank you God, for snow!

My birthday, and my amazing husband!

So Sunday morning was like any other Sunday for me and my family. Paul woke earlier and got ready and left with a sweet kiss. I soon got up with the girls and got them breakfast while I finished getting myself ready for church. After they were done I began to get the girls ready.

I told Haddie, "Today is my birthday!"

"Oh, it is?" she replied excitedly

"Yup"

"I sing to you! Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday for mommy..."

"oh Haddie that was beautiful, I love it!"

"Can I eat your Cake?"

"Yes, Haddie you can have some of my cake when we get some!" I answered through my laughter

We finished getting all ready and got into the car. Haddie continued to sing me the birthday song all the way to church. Mind you it is not very far.

Church was wonderful and good. After church paul quickly came to get me and brought me to the car. He told me to get in, confused I did. He then whisked me away, that is after I said goodbye to my girls, of whom one was worried she wouldn't get any cake with me going away. After assuring her we would get some when I got back, we left for Kearney, NE. (Kearney is an hour and half way. The closest larger town.)

There we went to the mall and I got to get some clothes, they were having a huge sale at Old Navy, just for me I am sure! Then we went to see a Movie, Money Ball is very good! After that fantastic movie we went to eat at Red Lobster! YUMMY! We then went to stay in a hotel for the night.

Paul had this all planned for me, he had my bags packed (all except for shoes), the girls a place to stay and to be taken care of, plus their bags (all except for shoes). It was a huge surprise and a wonderful treat. Paul is amazing and loves to do things like this for me, and I love it! Him too!

I was very surprised about the weekend. I had no idea. I knew it was going to be a busy weekend and did not know when we would be able to celebrate my birthday. I was not expecting this at all! It was so nice to get away without the girls and spend some good quality time with my hubby! I am truly blessed!

When we got back the girls were happy to see us. They were tired from all the fun they had, plus waking up extra earlier then usual, my apologies to Larry and Kathy. They usually sleep until 8, but being in a new place they awoke at 6:30 to the joy of the ones who were taking care of them.

We got to the house and I noticed that our pumpkins had been stolen!!! Yes, we went to a friends who had a small pumpkin patch and got several pumpkins, but yesterday someone stole all but three! How funny is that. It was wired that someone stole them in the first place, but even more so that they left 3 of them.

After noticing that they were stolen Haddie also noticed.

"Oh, no my pumpkins!' she exclaimed, It is amazing how much she pays attention to what we say and how much she understands! But she was very sad about the pumpkins!

There and Back again, a tale by a youth ministers wife

We have had quite the adventure in moving out to Norton. Let me tell you of the tale; There and Back again.

We were packed and ready to go. One of the few times that our family was prepared to leave at the time we said we wanted to leave by. Paul gives Mazie (our dog) some calming pills to help her on the long journey, while I got a movie ready for the girls to help them. We hoped into our cars and start our engines, except on problem mine wouldn’t start.

Great, well, so we thought we would be leaving on time…

Paul gets out the jumper cables and tries to jump it, but the cables are not making a connection. I say a little prayer, and sure in enough a friend and neighbor across the street comes to say goodbye and ends up helping us. He got the cables to work. The battery got a jump and the van started. Now we were on our way.

After picking up my mom who was going with us to help with the girls and getting some doughnuts we were finally, really, on our way. We went through the toll and found that someone had paid for however many cars to go through. Mom proclaimed, that was God blessing us on the journey.

Mom and I had a jolly good time. We talked and laughed and truly enjoyed each other. When Haddie got restless and began to have a fit. Nothing would consol her. Not Nana, not threats on her life, not even candy. I was being driven crazy by her fit when the van began to shake wildly. I was on the highway and not knowing what to do I slow down and got over to the slow going lane with my hazards on and called Paul over the walki-talkie to let him know I need to stop. We pull over at the next exit to take a look at the tires and under the hood. Everything seemed fine. We decided to go on to Cracker Barrel a few miles a head to stop and eat.

After we get back into the van we start on the highway again and it continued to shake, just not as bad. I slowed back down and got ready to stop, when the shacking just suddenly stopped.

The rest of the trip to Norton was event free, Haddie finally fell asleep and we had a peaceful trip.

Paul asked Larry if someone could take a look at the van because we needed to take it with us the next day to Canon City to pick up the rest of our stuff.

Thankfully someone did look at it, however he couldn’t find anything wrong and said that it could be something else something serious. So in good wisdom Paul decided to leave the van in Norton. Which meant that all five of us with our luggage and two car seats had to fit into the car. That would be fine and dandy, but the car seats take up much more room then just two little girls or even two adults. I was squished between the two car seats, having to sit sideways so I could fit for 6 hours.

At one point when we were all asleep Paul shouts, “Oh my, that guys dead!” This wakes mom and me with curiosity. While we were sleeping Paul was driving along side a man for some time when he passed Paul and was in the fast lane going probably 90. The driver then begins to drift. Hitting the guard in the road the man looked as if he tried to correct and over corrected sending his car into a flipping frenzy. Paul said he flipped several times before landing in the ditch. We of course stop immediately, but so did several others. After praying for the man, Paul decided to go on seeing as several had stopped and he had a car full with two little ones. Passing the wreck we saw how bad it was, it looked scary. I fearful reminder of how fragile life is. I prayed for us to have a safe arrival.

That shook Paul and he was awake as we drove into Denver. But I needed a break so we stopped at the new IKEA. That stores is amazing! It is huge! I love it. But I could not help but to sing the song from Veggie Tales in Madam Blue Berry, “Stuff Mart”. I really enjoyed going through there, it took us two hours and we made a huge wish list. But we made it out with only spending $10. Most of that was on the snack we had. Yes, their Swedish meat balls really are that good!

We got back in the car and began making our way. We only had 2 more hours until we were into Canon City. Oh, how the ride hurt. No, not just because I was squished between two car seats, but because this was a very familiar drive. One I’d take each time coming from the airport or when we were coming back from Denver having some family fun. It also was the very drive I took with the minister’s wife and youth sponsor when we first moved there just 21 months before. It hurt that we were now taking it to go pack and leave Colorado. A place I dreamed I would live in since I was a little girl and we would travel here for Family vacations. I finally got to live here, but now it was time to leave.

We got into Colorado Springs when I received a text from a friend in Canon City; worried because there had been a real bad wreck on HW 115 the HW we have to take from Springs to Canon City. When we passed it we saw how bad it was. Yet another reminder of how fragile life is. The cars had a front on collision; one of the cars had been crushed so bad that the front was in the backseat of the car. It was fatal we later found out. I again prayed for a safety in getting to Canon.

We did make it into Canon City alive.

I am thankful that my Dad and Paul had decided to go up two weeks before and do some packing. They practically packed up the whole house. There would have been no way we could have got it all done in the time we wanted to if it had not been for them. Basically all we had to do was load up the truck and clean up the house.

That whole week was very hard for me. I also had to say goodbye to my first house. I think it hurt even more because of the circumstances in why we had to move. If we were leaving just go to another ministry it would have been one thing, but we were leaving because they asked us to. That feeling of being unwanted swelled in my throat. But God is always so good, he was right there next to me reminding me that he wants me and that he has great plans for us in Norton.

The next day we began loading and only one guy, a very good friend of ours came to help us at first. This hurt because two others told Paul that they would be there, but one ended up having to work and the other just didn’t show. I had a hard time not being bitter because we had a ton of people who came to help us move in, but now we were left to ourselves to get it done. But in my pity there showed up a mother of one of the sons in the youth group. Her husband couldn’t come, but she could. She did it to say thank you for all that Paul had done for her son. Its amazing how God can pull you out of your self pity if you only trust him and see his many blessings.

Also while we were there we did get to see some good friends and enjoy a good-bye party given by some amazing friends of ours. It was nice, because we also got to see some of the kids in the youth again and hang with them. Haddie was able to see some of her friends that she too missed. It was so cute to see her so excited and running around with her little friends.

One little girl we didn’t get to see though. A girl Haddie loved dearly and I watched her every Tuesday for about a year. But the family was too busy and we were there only for a few days so we did not get to see her. I think I was more hurt then Haddie, even though she still talks about her.

During the night of the party, it got really cold and rainy and foggy. I was sort of spooky. We were all having fun enjoying each other when all of a sudden the lights went out. Ironic don’t you think, that on a foggy, cold, and rainy night that the lights go out. It scared my mother, because she was just about to let Haddie go down the stairs when it went out. My mom frantically grabs Eden and yells out for Haddie grabbing her before she fell down the stairs. The rest of the night was spent by candlelight, romantic huh…

The fog hung around all that next day. We left at about 11:00 to head back to Norton and there was still a fog. It got thicker and thicker as we left Canon, it was crazy because we were still driving in a thick fog at 2:00 in the afternoon. I was scared to death trying to follow Paul. The fog was so thick I could not see him 20 feet in front of me. Afraid I would hit him, I refused to go faster then 65mph. This made for a long trip. Even when we got on to I-70 there was still a thick fog for about another 30 miles. While on I-70 I got separated from Paul. Refusing to go faster then 65 I just stayed behind these group of motorist. But while following them this other moving truck with a trailer and truck attached behind it comes beside me trying to pass. It was going too fast to have a hitch. The truck that was on the back was bouncing back and forth on the road freaking me out. I finally slowed down to let it pass and then stayed a very good distance for fear that the hitch was going to come off from the swaying.

Finally the fog lifted and visibility was clear enough for me to speed up and catch back up with Paul. Luckily there were no more exciting events as we drove into Norton.

That is my tale of “There and Back Again”

I laugh now at the remark my mom made at the beginning of the trip. Although I still believe it, God did bless our trip, it just was an exciting one full of adventure! But what is an adventure with out adversity to overcome.

Moving to Norton

Wow, it has been a very long time since I have posted on here. A lot has happened in these few months. As you know from my last post Paul had lost his job in Canon City. We moved in with his parents awaiting our next adventure. We had an understanding that it could be a while before Paul would get a job back in the ministry so we were ready to get any job first available to us. Paul began putting his resume out there, really everywhere, but in Ministry. Paul wanted to take the month of July to pray about the situation and for healing. We were really hurt so we were not sure if we wanted to get right back into ministry. I even think I thought deep down inside, that no one would want us because we had been fired. But God had other planes.

One night Paul was talking to God about the situation. He was talking to God about the hurt and how maybe he doesn’t want to be in the ministry for a while. He asked God to be clear as to what he should do. He decided to put this out there; he wouldn’t look for a job in the ministry for the whole month of July, and if You (GOD) want me to be in ministry You’ll have to put it in my lap.

Paul continued his job search, when he landed on a job with selling insurance through Affleck. Paul was really enjoying the training and was dreaming up how fun it would be to work for them. He told me he thinks that he wants to pursue this for a while and take a rest from ministry. Hesitant, but I agreed knowing his hurt. He was in full fledge mode to learn and do well at this job.

That week he got an e-mail from a mentor and professor from College who knew about the situation. He mentioned this job that was available in a small town in Kansas, they were looking for a youth minister and gave us the contact info. I was not really interested finding out that it was 8 hours from Muskogee, but something within me made me think of it often and I asked Paul what he thought.

That is when he told me his agreement he had made with God. I asked him if he thought this was God putting it in his lap, Paul didn’t think so, just a kind e-mail from someone who cares and is trying to be helpful.

However, the next day he got another e-mail, this from the minister of that church asking for Paul’s resume. After talking it over he decided that he felt like this was God putting it in his lap. So he sent his resume. But still seemed resistant.

In the mean time Paul received yet, another e-mail from his professor of another job. But Paul was unsure of the location and didn’t pursue it.

I began praying for Paul because I could see the resistance he had in his heart towards being in the ministry again. He was very involved and excited about this job with Affleck, and it concerned me.

I want to be clear Paul was Genuinely excited about this job selling insurance. He was studying hard in training and getting ready to take the test that would license him to sell insurance. He was very dedicated and talked about it ALL the time.

I talked with Paul about his resistance toward getting into ministry and that he should pray about it. That he did. That night he talked to God about his excitement and dreams he had in selling insurance. How we would live in Muskogee and he would sell insurance so well that we would get out of debt and also get to live close to family. It could be dream come true. However, if this was not God’s plane for his life that he would have to change his heart and passion with this dream he has.

Low and behold God did just that. While at class Paul was listening and taking notes like a star pupil, when God directed his imagination back to youth ministry and Paul began daydreaming about what he would like to do and how he’d like to try some new things. Before he knew it he was far behind in class. Paul simply said, “Okay, God I get it.” He finished that day well, but was excited to get back to tell me what happened and of his renewed excitement for youth ministry.

The church in Kansas got back with us saying that they talked with all his references and would like for us to Skype with them. Still not really excited about the possibility of going so far, but having a deep feeling that this is the direction we should peruse, we accepted the offer.

During the Skype meeting Paul and I were very honest not wanting them to get any of the wrong impressions. After the meeting we were still confused as to what we should do, but were delighted by the feeling that they let off. We began praying very hard for Gods direction.

Not long after the Skype meeting they asked us to come out to Norton to take a look. Nervous and unsure, we decided to go. We both had a deep feeling that we were to continue to pursue this for whatever reason.

While we were there in for some reason I was the one who was resistant. Paul, one the other hand was excited and encouraged. Which was so good to see after seeing the hurt and pain he had just gone though and knowing the resistance/fear he had with going back into the ministry. However, No matter how much I felt like I didn’t want to be in Norton all those feelings would leave when I would get with the People. Such genuine, loving people, not sure what it was but I loved the people. But then I would get a lone and would get the feeling of dread.

It is a small town, with NO Wal-Mart. The closest Wal-Mart is an hour away in a whole other state! It was also 8 hours from home. I wanted to be closer and in a bigger town then 3,500! Paul suggested I talk to God about it, so I did. I told him how resistant I am to this. I told him how I wanted to be closer to home and how I want the comforts of home and of a bigger town. I told him how I don’t think I could do well, I would be lonely and alone. So if you want us to move, you are going to have to change my heart! That was Saturday.

Sunday came and we were meeting everyone, and in my heart I was thinking what kind, sweet people, but we will not be moving here. Then that night we went to youth Group, I don’t know when and how it happened but after that night I left Telling Paul, “Okay, I am excited. I think we should come here!”

Again, I don’t know how or when in the night it happened, but my heart changed. Although I was still not excited about moving 8 hours away from family and friends, nor was I excited to not have a Wal-Mart with in 60 miles of me. I knew this was where God wanted us to be.

On Monday before we started making our way back to Muskogee, we stopped by the church to see the minister. There he told us what we would expect in the next few weeks. They had been interviewing another person for the job and they would let us know if they still plan on bringing him out too, or if they would just offer us the job. We would know in a few days what they planned to do.

I was not worried, not one bit. I was sort of hopping that they would bring out the other guy, this way we would know without a doubt that if they still chose us. If they went with the other guy, no big deal, Paul still could pursue Affleck.

Two days later we got a call saying that they decided not to bring the other candidate out and that if we would like the job it was ours. We told them that we wanted a week to pray about it and we would get back to them.

Within that week we received yet another e-mail from a minster who had heard of Paul and would like for him to send his resume. Paul and I prayed over it and felt that we shouldn’t. We believe it was God reminding us that as long as we trust and follow him, he will still use us. Also, that He wants us even though Grandview didn’t.

After a week of praying and talking to those we trust, we nervously accepted the position.

Wow, is all I have to say. God is so very amazing and so very good. I am completely humbled by his goodness and provision. We were so hurt and scared by what happened at the end of June. But now we are comforted by the fact that we still matter and that God still has plans for us. That he worked so hard for us to get us a job in ministry. It is so amazing to me that God, the all powerful, creator has a plan and a purpose for me and my family, that he would take the time to move mountains or my and Paul’s heart to get us in a spot where he wants us.

We sent our application in the middle of July accepted the position in the middle of August. We lived with Paul’s parents for only 2 ½ months, when we thought there would be no way we could move out before 6 months at least. God blew me away! I believe through this, it was God saying to us that as long as we trust and follow Him, He will still use us. Also, that He wants us even though Grandview didn’t.

God's is sooo Good

When I found out, I was still in Muskogee. I was down stairs talking to Mom and Dad waiting for Tara to arrive so we can start hearing all about their vacation to Rome and the Mediterranean. Just as Tara was getting in the door, my phone rang. I hadn't heard much from Paul since he went back to Colorado just 2 days prier because his phone didn't get reception by the mountain wear we lived. So I quickly answered anxious to hear his voice. But his voice was not his usual. I ran upstairs so I could hear him better away from the noise of excitement down stairs. This is when he told me.

After getting off the phone I carried myself down stairs to tell the family. Sick and disbelief swept over me. Anger and tears welled inside. I was upset, I didn't understand, and I was confused as to why.

The next morning I awoke with this song, "Everlasting God" at the very forefront of my mind. I basically awoke singing it. "Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord,"

That day I met up with Paul and we were able to talk things over and get a plan in motion. But things were still very confusing.

Wednesday morning I work up singing these words "When you don't understand, when you can't see God's plane, trust his heart."

God continued to encourage me in this way because the next morning I work quoting Proverbs 3 "Trust in the LORD with all your Heart, lean not on your own understanding". I later that day went to look it up and saw how helpful that Proverbs 3:5-12 was.

Again God put a scripture on my mind when I awoke the Friday morning Philippians 4:4-7 "rejoice in the Lord always again I will say rejoice, let your gentleness be evident to all, for the Lord is near. Do not worry about anything but in everything, with prayer and petition, and thanksgiving offer your request to God, and the peace of God that paces all understanding will guide your hearts in Christ Jesus."

I would not have made it through so easily without these sweet reminders and encouragement from my God.

He was even faithful when I was weak. While we were white water rafting on Sunday I was thinking about the situation and was hurting when I looked up and written on the back of our guides safety pack was "the Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still" Exodus 14:14

I still don't agree with how and why things happened they way they did and why they did. But I am better in knowing that God has carried me through. He has reminded me daily of who he is and daily protected me from the evil ones lies. I am so thankful for his Care and protection. He is a great God who loves me very much.

okay here we go...

This is still very fresh, but Paul and I have had time to pray and talk it over with friends, family, and mentors.

Paul got in from visiting family briefly in Muskogee on Saturday night. He went to finish setting things up to be ready for service on Sunday. After leading Worship on Sunday, Paul went in to work, which is usually his day off. but because I was coming back into Colorado the next day, Tuesday, and because he was going to have to go to Denver to pick me up. He chose to work Monday. That afternoon, the minister, and one other Elder met with him. They talked to him briefly and said, they thought it is best if Paul would resign. (Just to be clear, there are NO moral issues involved!) This came as a huge shock, we have had our struggles, but it had only been 18 mo.

There are a lot of reasons for resigning most are small and insignificant, the greatest cause was because we are not the fit for Grandview. All in all, I feel that we were not given much time to adjust to the difference in culture. We felt as if we were just coming accustom to things when they asked for us to leave.

We care a great deal for Grandview, and Trust God's hand is in this. Although we are so glade to have served there, our time has come to an end. It has been the hardest most exhausting year and half of our lives. But we have learned a lot being there. I feel as if we have learned 5 yrs worth of experience in just 1 1/2 years.

God is so good and continues to take care of us. They gave Paul a choice of taking the kids to CIY or not, Paul chose to do so. After that our responsibilities were done, but are paid until August. We put our house on the market, packed up what we could, and said some quick goodbyes, then left for Muskogee, with plans to return soon. Here we are at Paul's parents until we see were God is leading us to next. In the mean time Paul is looking for a job both here in Muskogee to get us through the transitional time and one for the future

We are not done with Ministry. We learned too much in this last one to be through, we feel as if we were just getting started with even more to learn.

God has been wonderful in providing encouragement both to Me and Paul.
The beginning of last month before we knew of anything. Paul went to Camp at Camp Como. There he was encouraged greatly by other youth ministers and even by one in particular who talked a long time with him. God knew he would need these as reminders that Paul is in the ministry He had called him too. God had continued to encourage him even after the event through friends, family, and mentors. For this I am VERY thankful.


God has encouraged me too, by giving me scripture or a song on my mind each morning I awoke for the first week. He is ever so faithful and is my comforter. Although it is a scary time, things can look more like an adventure when God is ever so present. When things don't make sense and even seem unfair, We can make it when We know that God is on our side.

CIY

Wow! Is the first words to my mind. It was a great week! Very informative and very inspiring. The weekend before we went to Noah's ark which is a camping, rafting, and rock climbing place. We stayed two nights and had only 3 of our kids with us for the first night. We cooked out on Paul's pocket rocket, because we thought there was burn bane, but found out later there wasn't. The funny thing was the next day we went to get fire wood and the burn bane came in effect that night.
the first day we went white water rafting, which was a BLAST! The kids seemed to really enjoy it too. Later that night the other 2 kids arrived and joined us for frito chilli pie and smores over the pocket rocket. very funny site to see.
After freezing our tails off for two nights we got into Durango to go to the conference. The first day was focused on Samuel, we learned about how he listened to God and then God spoke mighty things through Samuel. Then we learned about Rahab, the prostitute, and how even though we may have a past, God can and will still use us, we need only to be willing. Thursday was the most intense day. We learned about Radshack, Meshack, and Abendigo (spelling is wrong I know) and how they were faithful in the small and became faithful in the big and God showed his great power through them! That night we also got to hear of Awjai Lawll Speak (spelling again is wrong) He is a minister in India, who has planted over 500 churches and has been persecuted for the faith. He shared many amazing, awe-inspiring stories about those who have been faithful for the cause of the Gospel. After He spoke we watched a documentary by CIY called "love cost everything" it is about the persecuted church and how it is the number one persecuted group in the world right now. They mentioned that if you care anything about human rights you should care about the persecuted christians. It was almost overwhelming, but completely eye opening. It made all my troubles seem like nothing. The last day we talked about John the baptist and how his job was to prepare the way for the Lord. How his life pointed to Christ and how ours should too!
The kids that went got a lot out of it, I think. Most of them it was their first time to CIY. I think CIY will have as great an impact in their life as it did ours.
I am very thankful we went to CIY. It was not only a great conference, but it allowed us to have some great time and memories with the kids before we left. Those kids are amazing and we truely love them. I got to see some really neat things that week in the lives of the two girls I was with most of the time. One of the girls whom I have known the whole 18 mo we were in Canon, finally allowed me to see a glimps of her heart this week, and I loved what I saw. She has an amazing spirit and such a desire to serve God and lead others to him. She has such the gift in leadership, I am praying that she uses it this year to lead the youth group since they are now with out a youth paster for a little while. She has been their only constant person and they need her to lead them. The other girl is so sweet and tender, but she realized how quickly she lets other dictate her. She desires now to lead others, she will be a gentle leader, one who will lead more with passion and actions then anything, which is exactly what is needed! I am so thankful for the short time I had with them, they have taught me so much. Lessons that Paul and I will treasure, and may not have been able to see as clearly if things were not happening the way they are.

Sometime in Muskogee

After a while of processing what to do while Paul was at camp. We decided to fly me and the girls down to spend some time in Muskogee for Eden's birthday and while Paul did camps. We got in just before Eden's birthday and had an amazing time, all for the fact that her daddy couldn't be there. It was a watermelon theme party with an amazing cake made by one of my friends. We played in the water, even though Eden would screem anytime she was brought near the water.
We then had lots of time with Aunt Haley, cousin Alexa, Aunt Tara, cousin Piper and Miley, Granny, Pepaw, Nana, Papa, and more.
After the first week Nana and Papa left to go on a cruise in the Metateranian. So we spent the next week at Granny and Pewpas. It was fun and we enjoyed it tramendously.
Paul even got to join us for a few days inbetween camps. We went to the aquarium and to the water park. We made sure we had a blast here in Oklahoma before we went back to Colorado.
After 2 1/2 weeks I flew back to Colorado to join Paul and go with him to CIY.
The girls then got to spend another week and half in Muskogee waiting on their mommy and Daddy to get back.

Eden's first birthday

Eden turned one!

She is 17.3 lbs

27 inches long

less the 5th %

She is little, but she eats a lot! Her personality is soo much fun. She maybe shy at first, but if you take a moment to get to know her you realize how sweet she is. She loves to flirt and tease, most of all she loves to be held. She has such a sweet smile that just gets you every time. She also has a stinker smile that she gives when she is being ornery. She is learning to stand up for her self and is a quick crawler to get away from her sister. She may be little but she compensates with how she eats. She loves food, and never seems to get full.. She also compensates for her smallness by being loud when she needs to be. If she doesn't think something is just she will let you know. Such as when she doesn't have your attention or if Haddie is annoying her. She also loves her schedule, but she is doing better with being flexible

so much to say...

There are so many things I need to post and update. So over the next few days or so I will posting updates on our life. A lot has happened over the last month and lot needs to be said! Eden turned one, I spent some time in Muskogee, we left Canon City and we went to CIY, then we moved to Muskogee. These and more will be coming in detail in the next few days.

God is doing something, we may not be sure what just yet, But we trust that it will be good and very much an adventure!

my heart hurts

"It would be such a great day to be rid of those filthy Christians who are obviously every reason that this Earth is in utter chaos at the moment. If we didn't have Christians, we would be in a world with nothing but like-minded, rational people. Since absolutely no rational or intellectual Christian exists on this Earth, it would be best if they just left."

Someone I know posted a video of what if the christians all got raptured and what the world would be like. That was a comment from someone on the video.

It hurts my heart. I hurts my heart, to see that people think so badly of Christians. It hurts my heart that there had been christians who made such a terrible example of us all to this person. It hurts my heart that there are sooo many more christians who care more about themselves then about their love for God. It hurts my heart that so many have met a christian who don't lead their lives to God, but instead away from him. I am crying now thinking of three people I love so very dearly who care nothing for God or his followers because of other who claimed Christianity yet left such a bad taste in their mouth that they want nothing to do with HIM.

I am heart broken to here that unbelievers want us gone because they have met too many who are not nice, but are unkind, even mean.

I am sorry to all of you! I am sorry that someone who carried the banner I live for was not living in the way our Lord asked them to! I am sorry that because of them you think I am just as fake. I am sorry that you think we are all alike! I am sorry that you were not shown the unconditional love that we stand for. I am sorry that you didn't feel God's ever increasing grace, even though we have been given so much more and need it ever still. I am sorry that we did not show you God, yet instead you saw a hypocrite, a fake, someone who is not what a christian should look like.

I hope you meet other Christians, but one that lives true to what we stand for. One that reflects the character and love of God! Several who live as Christ did, the whole reason why we call ourselves christians in the first place. I pray that all the other christians you meet from this day forward are those who point their life to God and live that way. So that you may see what christians should look like...

Spiritual Retreat

It had been a really rough last couple of months. We had been stressed and were worn out. Luckily, Jay, the minister at the church, realized this and made it mandatory that Paul and I go off on a spiritual retreat. We were making planes to go with the kids. When Paul was told that it could not be with the kids.Well, like I said it has been a rough couple of months. I freaked out. The reason I freaked out was because everyone that we know and trust to keep our kids for three nights were very busy, two of them JUST (or was about to) had a baby. I didn't just want to send them off to someone that they don't know very well, and two kids under the age of 3, is a little much. It also would be the first time to stay the night way from Eden. I would not be able to relax if I was worrying about the girls. I told my concerns, Jay then said that in the budget for the retreat is enough to fly someone down from Oklahoma to watch our girls. So of course I called my parents and their wonderful employee's let them go.With this relief we were off to Glen Eyrie Castle.

Glen Eyrie Castle is a retreat, conference center, and (yes) an actual Castle. They have over 800 acres of hiking and walking and just absolute beauty. It is tucked away in Colorado Springs right next to the Garden of the Gods in a little canyon. It is owned by the Navigators, but was built by General Palmer of the Civil War. Beautiful Castle, we took a tour. But we didn't stay in there we stayed in a Cabin with others who were doing the retreat.

The retreat was great. We met with everyone at breakfast and then for worship then we were off to go spend time with the Lord however we saw fit. We went hiking and walking, took naps free to just relaxed and spent the day with the Lord. then that evening we met up with everyone again for Dinner and little devo. We were then free again to go about with what we were doing. It was very relaxed and the schedule was very loose and free. It was so great to have that time to just get away with God.

Both Paul and I really enjoyed it. We want to go back and spend a week next time. I couldn't believe the amazing hospitality. I would recommend it to anyone!

I am very thankful that we got to go on this retreat, very thankful that the church sent me too, and that they flew my parents down to watch the girls.

It reminded of how much I need God and my need to stop and make sure I get quality time with him. It was a great time and a great reminder!

first ER visit

While Granny and Peepaw were here to visit, their last day actually, our curious daughter found their medication. She found it just when we were all distracted. Daddy was in the kitchen cooking breakfast, Granny, having just got out of the shower was changing along with Peepaw, and I was in the living room with Eden on the phone with a friend.

I asked if Haddie would come and say hi on the phone to my friends daughter. This is when I found out something was wrong.

Paul said that Haddie is in trouble for getting into some of Granny and Peepaw's things. I hung up the phone and when in to see what it was. Granny began to explain that she found Haddie with these open pill bottles and several pills on the floor, handing me a handful of bottles. She continued to tell me that she had found several chewed up pills that she had spit out.

I first tried calling my pediatrician, but they were closed on that day. I then tried calling a friend who's husband is a dr. but was unable to get a hold of her. So I called poison control. After counting all the pills and narrowing down which ones she could have swallowed, the lady told me to go to the ER.

Thinking that this will not take long, I didn't pack much and away we went.

I don't know what I was thinking because when we got to the ER we were immediately told that the poison control contacted them and told them what meds she could have swallowed and were informed that we will not just be there for the afternoon (mind you this is at 9:30 in the morning), but we will be staying the night, in the ICU.

They wanted to monitor her closely for 24 hours. The meds she took could cause her heart to misfire and/or her blood presser to drop.

Oh, joy. Maybe this experience will teach haddie not to be so noisy. WRONG!!

Although the heart monitors and the IV were uncomfortable and even hurtful. I think she enjoyed her experience far too much. She had many visitors two of which are her good friends. with the visitors come gifts and food. Even though she had to stay in the hospital bed, she was the center of attention and enjoyed charming all the doctors and nurses.

Durning the night her blood presser did drop to a uncomfortable 38, but went back up with no other problems. We were released the next morning with no farther instructions, that is other then KEEP your meds hidden and out of reach. Which is what we were doing, she is just very clever. Oh, and the caps are not child proof, they are child resistant, just to let you know. The poison control lady told me that MOST 2 yr olds can get into them. Which is funny because most other cannot.

A renewed passion

Okay, so this has been a long time passion of mine that has resurfaced. God has been tweeking my heart a lot about this issue lately. So much so that it has kept me up most nights. I am still figuring out what can be done. That is other then prayer.

Well, I guess I shall tell you what I am talking about.

A few weeks ago, I was talking to a friend and she was telling me some things her boys are struggling with at High school. One of which is with girls. This struggle caught me by surprise. I am not sure if it is because I didn't want to think that it was this bad or because I really didn't know. I never went to public school so I couldn't tell you if they did this when I was in high school or not. If they did it at my school, I wasn't aware. I was very naive, or still am, so I could have been clueless. But anyway, this friend proceeded to tell me that her boys were getting texts from girls who wanted to do them favors... sexual favors. I was shocked beyond belief.

I listened as the others shared similar concerns about the girls at the high school, and I tired very hard to hide my surprised face (which is nearly impossible for me). One story was of a girl who asked if her boyfriend could stay the night, her mother said "yes" so she asked her boyfriend. Who asked his mom. Luckily this mother is a wonderful mother, who replied "Are you kidding me, of course you can not!" She then took that opportunity to talk to her son about respecting girls and choosing wisely who he dates.

I could not believe all these stories I was hearing. My heart was broken. I began to cry. These poor girls, do they not realize how precious they are. Have they never been taught to respect themselves and to not throw themselves at just anyone? Where are these girls mothers and fathers, why are they not protecting them?

Also, these poor boys. They have not a chance. Girls are throwing themselves at them, offering favors and more. What hormonal teenage boy could say no? not many.

This began to eat at me more and more. The protective mother in me came out and I began to respond with anger, which I know is not the right action, but it ate at me. I began to think of my poor girls and how I want to protect them. I began to think of my future son (that I hope to have). I prayed and prayed for these girls and that I could channel this passion into love and for God to teach me how to love these girls.

Just the other day I went to a park across the high school. It was such a pretty day, perfect for going to the park. This park has swings and lower toys perfect for Haddie to play on. No one was there, I thought this was a perfect day and weird no one took advantage of the day. There was the park manager, cleaning and attending. There was also a man sitting on a bench drinking a pop, but he was just sitting there, looking as if he was waiting for something. I kept my eye on him as my little girl played. right at 11:00, the park manager quickly through his stuff in the van and drove swiftly away.

"In a hurry to go to lunch." I thought.

The other man started walking toward the play area, my heart started pounding, but he walked past where haddie was playing, up to a table where a girl had arrived (obviously from the high school). He greeted her with a kiss and a inappropriate touch. shocked I turned and tried to ignore the on going inappropriate scene to the left of me. With in minutes the park was full of high schoolers out for lunch. We were surrounded, but this was not what made me the most uncomfortable. It was the language being said, the PDA that every couple began to do, and the smoking that too young of kids started. I was horrified, by all that was going on. They had no respect for me or my girls. They noticed me alright and even commented on my cute kids. One girl who was right behind me began telling her friends a story using such language, I blushed. I turned and politely asked her to not use such language. She did apologize, for that I was pleasantly surprised. I immediately got up and tried to convince haddie to get off the play set. While bribing Haddie, two girls and a boy passed me talking.

One of the girls saying, "What if my mom is home, what do I say to her about your boyfriend.? Do I tell her I am not sure if he's your boyfriend?"

Once I finally got home, I cried. Also, swore to myself that Haddie and Eden are never going to that school. I was also out raged that these kids were set free to do whatever they liked during lunch. Where is a supervisor. These kids left alone, not having been taught what is right, will obviously do what is wrong, or whatever feels good to them.

Frustrated, I called the school. This is what they told me: "We have open lunch, we can not do anything if they are off the school property. We do have a police officer who drives by the park periodically. I will let them know they were miss behaving."

My anger boiled. OPEN LUNCH! They are crazy! Obviously these kids are not responsible enough and should not have open lunch anymore. Also these kids are directly across the street from the HS. You could look out the windows of the HS and see all that was going on, yet NOTHING could be done.

I called my mom to vent my frustration. She calmed me down and reminded me to channel my passion back to love. Love... it is because of love that I am passionate about these kids. Love... yet for some reason it is easier to respond in anger then in Love. I do love these kids, this is why I wanted to be in youth ministry. It is because of the lack of true love that these kids do not know better.

I want something to be done. I want these girls to know that they are worth so much more then their bodies. I want them to know their value, so that they will not find their value in boys or sexual favors. I want them to know God, and his love for them. I want them to choose a life that is the best for them, one living in the presence of God. A life that gives them meaning, true pleasure, and worth. This is my renewed passion.

Snow

I finally have time to blog...

Phew, it has been a long week. But exciting non the less.

We are back at home and trying to get back into the swing of things.

Last week was an entertaining week. We got stuck in Oklahoma, no complaints from me, but a few from Paul. We were suppose to return to Colorado on Tuesday, but a blizzard in Oklahoma snowed us in. Yes, a blizzard in Oklahoma, you read that right. It dumped 8 inches and up to 20 inches in some other places. But the worst part was the snow drifts which got up to 5 ft in some

areas. Oklahoma was basically closed down for a few days. Even Walmart closed.

Needless to say, our flight was canceled. So we re-scheduled for Wednesday, and that too was canceled. We finally got a flight out for Thursday night. The one problem then was the roads. They were terrible to drive on especially with the rented car that only had rear wheel drive. We barely made it over to Paul's parents from my parents house, much less make it safely to Tulsa's airport 45 min away.

Luckly, a friend of my family, offered to drive us to the airport, who had four wheel drive. But it still proved to be a long journey, taking us 2 hours. We differently would not have made it without four wheel drive.

We flew out with only a few minutes of a delay, and made it into Denver. It fairly late because of time change and we still had a 2 hour drive home, arriving to Canon city around 1:00 am, 2:00 am Ok time.

The next day was a crazy one for Paul. He had to leave for winter retreat at 3:00 that afternoon. So when the girls and I got all ready we went to the church to help Paul with any last minute jobs he needed done for the retreat.

Paul, got back from a fantastic weekend with the kids on Sunday afternoon. He fit in a short nap before we went off to a Super Bowl party at a friends. Getting in late again we relaxed all day Monday. Then that night we went to a movie with some friends. We saw Sanctum, I would not suggest it. I hate movies like that... I like to leave movies feeling inspired or at least with some good feeling. I didn't leave that movie feeling anything good. But it was a well made movie, I will give it that.

Tuesday, The church office was closed due to snow, but Paul still had to work, so he locked himself in the bedroom to escape from a curious little girl who loves her Daddy. It snowed all day and was beautiful. But, it didn't keep us from going to see Spamelot in Co. Springs with some other friends. Awesome, show! It was a very funny show. I enjoyed it tremendously, something about being at a live show.

I love the theatre! It makes me want to be on stage.

Today, was a fairly normal day, and it looks like we will be getting back to the swing of things soon. However, Paul and I hope to improve how we swing things. But, I will save that for a later post... "Improving life skills"

Pic, I stole from someone at JBU.

Celebrating 25 yrs of ministry at Boulevard

We pulled off surprising my parents by coming in from Colorado to Muskogee and showing up on Sunday morning. They had not one clue and were so very surprised.

Let me start from the beginning.

A month ago I received a call from my sister Jamie. She said there is something I want to talk to you about Mom and dad. Thinking of what it could be I thought it might have to do with their wedding anniversary which was January 8th. However, Jamie was thinking of another anniversary. Their 25th anniversary of ministry with Boulevard. She told me I must call Lisa Able and talk with her about all they have planned. When I called her she began to tell me all of the wonderful things they had in store for my parents. One of which was to fly us down to surprise them at church on that Sunday. But we had a month to keep this a secret. I was not sure how were going to pull this off. But we did.

Paul and I flew in Friday night and the girls were such good passengers. We went immediately to Paul's parents house. We were going to stop by Tara's to say hi before heading into Muskogee, but Tara called with urgency to not come, because Mom was insistent that she come to see her gandgirls and to celebrate Tara's birthday, which was a few days before. So went went on to Muskogee. We stayed at Paul's house all day so not to accidentally run into anyone who may give us away. This was also a huge blessing to Paul's parents, because they were itching to see the girls too. It also happened to be Greg's birthday weekend.

Sunday finally came. We arrived at the church and waited for the cue to come in. When we did we were debriefed on how it was to go down.

Boulevard has two services. So at the first service Dad was surprised with the fact that he was not to preach, even though he had prepared a wonderful sermon for that day. Instead one of his really good friends came, who has a very busy schedule, but made room for this event, to preach. This come very unexpected to Dad and was pleasantly surprised to both hear and see his long, old, good friend.

But unknown to Mom and Dad, there was another surprise in store for them during the second service.

When one of the elders was explaining to those at the second service what had happen during the previous service. We, Tara, Ken, Jamie, Paul, Aunt Nada, Grammy, Uncle Carlos, and I walk in from the side with Piper, Miley, Haddie, and Eden leading the way. They were so very surprised, they had all their children there. It was a Success!

After church we had a lunch at Maylon's with leaders of the church, family, and a few friends.

Then we went home a relaxed a few hours, talking about the morning and with Mark and Carla Scott. At 5:30 we went back to the church for a banquet in honor of Mom and Dad's ministry.

There they were graced with many stories of Dad in his ministry. Jay then invited them to play "the price was right, couple addition." during which they won an Ipod and a 7 day cruise to the Mediterranean! This came as a huge shock to both Mom and Dad. They had no idea this was all planned for them. They both said they felt very loved and honored by all that happened that day. They also said they were just content with the first surprise of the morning, but that it just kept coming and were overwhelmed by the end of the day by the generosity of all who were involved. Thank you boulevard family for taking such good care of my family. Thank you for helping them raise us. Thank you for supporting my mom and Dad through their 25 yrs of ministry at Boulevard. Thank you for loving us!

I am in ministry because of my Dads great example and he is in ministry at boulevard because of you! THANK YOU!

a few of Haddie's favorites

Haddie has an addicting personality. Yes, she is always fun to be around and that you always miss her when your not with her, but this is not what I am talking about. What I mean is that she gets addicted to things and becomes obsessed with them. Such as Toy Story. She is in love with the whole cast and all the movies. She is especially fond of Jessie. She received a Jessie doll for Christmas from her Granny and has not put her down since. Anytime she gets a chance she asks to watch "Toy story" and gets so excited when either Woody or Buzz comes on. She even says "oh no, Jessie" when at the end of Toy Story 2 Woody is running after Jessie in the airplane. She is also addicted to or obsessed with snow and bath time. Also a new obsession is to the book given to her by her Granny. Is not just the book, its the fact that it is read to her by her Granny. Granny had recorded her voice reading the book. Haddie LOVES it.

Last night I went to read her another book and she whined, "no, no, Nana" (she gets confused sometimes between granny and her nana.) So I grabed the book that Granny recorded and said, "you want the book Granny gave?" Haddie was so excited! We opened it up and Granny's voice began to read the book. Haddie laughed and pointed to the speaker and said "nana," I corrected her with Granny, and then after each turned page and Granny began to read again, she would smile wide and say, "Granny!" so precious.

It makes me laugh, and I get tickled with her obsessions. But my favorite of late is with praying during meal times. She loves to pray and loves to remind us. Once we start praying she then repeats each phrase, such as "thank you for mommy!" "Danktu mommy!" "Thank you for Daddy" "Danktu Abigail" (yet another one of her obsessions).

She is so precious and makes me smile!

SNOW

I have always loved it when it would snow. An excitement rushes through me when I see that beautiful fluffy stuff falling from the sky. I get even more happy when I see that it is sticking to the ground. I become like a little girl on christmas day.The other day it began to snow, and each time I looked out the snow was getting thicker and thicker on the cars. We enjoyed a cozy day inside after church just enjoying watching it snow and build up on the ground and cars. Haddie was excited too, she kept climbing up on our couch to watch it snow. she would turn and say "oh no, snow!" She was actually really excited, she just thinks its fun to say 'no' and 'snow' together.

The next day we awoke with 8 inches of snow or more! Haddie was so excited she couldn't wait to play in the snow. So she and I got all bundled up to play outside in the snow.

Once we got out in the snow Haddie loved walking around in the snow that was past her knees. I then taught her how to make a snow angle. This made Haddie want to roll and crawl around in the snow. Mazie, our dog, liked the snow too. She jumped around and ate the snow. Haddie also liked to eat the snow. After around 30 min of playing in the snow. I was getting cold, so I knew Haddie had to be getting cold too. So I told Hadassah we needed to go in, but Haddie was refusing to go in without a fuss. So we played a little longer, until I bribed Haddie to come in with a Bubble bath. One thing Haddie loves more then snow, is a bubble bath.

Starting a bow buisness

I am in the process of starting to sell my bows. I started making hair bows just after haddie was born. I had bought several bows at a boutique in Joplin and got to thinking I could make these. So I began practicing how to make bows. I made several that I thought were GREAT, but looking back at them, they were not so great, but a beginning. I had to keep practicing over the year and half. Now I think I got it. Well, maybe.

I enjoy making them. It is relaxing to me to make bows. Which I think makes for a great hobbie. A hobbie I am hoping to make a few bucks off of. (or at least return my investment)

I am trying to build up an inventory so that I can take them to some local consignment stores in Canon City to see if they will sell them for me in their store. I am also going to be doing several craft shows this spring.

Paul is helping me create a web site, but until then I have a blog so others can check out the bows and prices.

If you know of anyone who would be interested in my bows, I would appreciate you passing the word along.

You can find me at www.myrtlegardenbowtique.blogspot.com