Eden's first birthday

Eden turned one!

She is 17.3 lbs

27 inches long

less the 5th %

She is little, but she eats a lot! Her personality is soo much fun. She maybe shy at first, but if you take a moment to get to know her you realize how sweet she is. She loves to flirt and tease, most of all she loves to be held. She has such a sweet smile that just gets you every time. She also has a stinker smile that she gives when she is being ornery. She is learning to stand up for her self and is a quick crawler to get away from her sister. She may be little but she compensates with how she eats. She loves food, and never seems to get full.. She also compensates for her smallness by being loud when she needs to be. If she doesn't think something is just she will let you know. Such as when she doesn't have your attention or if Haddie is annoying her. She also loves her schedule, but she is doing better with being flexible

so much to say...

There are so many things I need to post and update. So over the next few days or so I will posting updates on our life. A lot has happened over the last month and lot needs to be said! Eden turned one, I spent some time in Muskogee, we left Canon City and we went to CIY, then we moved to Muskogee. These and more will be coming in detail in the next few days.

God is doing something, we may not be sure what just yet, But we trust that it will be good and very much an adventure!

my heart hurts

"It would be such a great day to be rid of those filthy Christians who are obviously every reason that this Earth is in utter chaos at the moment. If we didn't have Christians, we would be in a world with nothing but like-minded, rational people. Since absolutely no rational or intellectual Christian exists on this Earth, it would be best if they just left."

Someone I know posted a video of what if the christians all got raptured and what the world would be like. That was a comment from someone on the video.

It hurts my heart. I hurts my heart, to see that people think so badly of Christians. It hurts my heart that there had been christians who made such a terrible example of us all to this person. It hurts my heart that there are sooo many more christians who care more about themselves then about their love for God. It hurts my heart that so many have met a christian who don't lead their lives to God, but instead away from him. I am crying now thinking of three people I love so very dearly who care nothing for God or his followers because of other who claimed Christianity yet left such a bad taste in their mouth that they want nothing to do with HIM.

I am heart broken to here that unbelievers want us gone because they have met too many who are not nice, but are unkind, even mean.

I am sorry to all of you! I am sorry that someone who carried the banner I live for was not living in the way our Lord asked them to! I am sorry that because of them you think I am just as fake. I am sorry that you think we are all alike! I am sorry that you were not shown the unconditional love that we stand for. I am sorry that you didn't feel God's ever increasing grace, even though we have been given so much more and need it ever still. I am sorry that we did not show you God, yet instead you saw a hypocrite, a fake, someone who is not what a christian should look like.

I hope you meet other Christians, but one that lives true to what we stand for. One that reflects the character and love of God! Several who live as Christ did, the whole reason why we call ourselves christians in the first place. I pray that all the other christians you meet from this day forward are those who point their life to God and live that way. So that you may see what christians should look like...

Spiritual Retreat

It had been a really rough last couple of months. We had been stressed and were worn out. Luckily, Jay, the minister at the church, realized this and made it mandatory that Paul and I go off on a spiritual retreat. We were making planes to go with the kids. When Paul was told that it could not be with the kids.Well, like I said it has been a rough couple of months. I freaked out. The reason I freaked out was because everyone that we know and trust to keep our kids for three nights were very busy, two of them JUST (or was about to) had a baby. I didn't just want to send them off to someone that they don't know very well, and two kids under the age of 3, is a little much. It also would be the first time to stay the night way from Eden. I would not be able to relax if I was worrying about the girls. I told my concerns, Jay then said that in the budget for the retreat is enough to fly someone down from Oklahoma to watch our girls. So of course I called my parents and their wonderful employee's let them go.With this relief we were off to Glen Eyrie Castle.

Glen Eyrie Castle is a retreat, conference center, and (yes) an actual Castle. They have over 800 acres of hiking and walking and just absolute beauty. It is tucked away in Colorado Springs right next to the Garden of the Gods in a little canyon. It is owned by the Navigators, but was built by General Palmer of the Civil War. Beautiful Castle, we took a tour. But we didn't stay in there we stayed in a Cabin with others who were doing the retreat.

The retreat was great. We met with everyone at breakfast and then for worship then we were off to go spend time with the Lord however we saw fit. We went hiking and walking, took naps free to just relaxed and spent the day with the Lord. then that evening we met up with everyone again for Dinner and little devo. We were then free again to go about with what we were doing. It was very relaxed and the schedule was very loose and free. It was so great to have that time to just get away with God.

Both Paul and I really enjoyed it. We want to go back and spend a week next time. I couldn't believe the amazing hospitality. I would recommend it to anyone!

I am very thankful that we got to go on this retreat, very thankful that the church sent me too, and that they flew my parents down to watch the girls.

It reminded of how much I need God and my need to stop and make sure I get quality time with him. It was a great time and a great reminder!

first ER visit

While Granny and Peepaw were here to visit, their last day actually, our curious daughter found their medication. She found it just when we were all distracted. Daddy was in the kitchen cooking breakfast, Granny, having just got out of the shower was changing along with Peepaw, and I was in the living room with Eden on the phone with a friend.

I asked if Haddie would come and say hi on the phone to my friends daughter. This is when I found out something was wrong.

Paul said that Haddie is in trouble for getting into some of Granny and Peepaw's things. I hung up the phone and when in to see what it was. Granny began to explain that she found Haddie with these open pill bottles and several pills on the floor, handing me a handful of bottles. She continued to tell me that she had found several chewed up pills that she had spit out.

I first tried calling my pediatrician, but they were closed on that day. I then tried calling a friend who's husband is a dr. but was unable to get a hold of her. So I called poison control. After counting all the pills and narrowing down which ones she could have swallowed, the lady told me to go to the ER.

Thinking that this will not take long, I didn't pack much and away we went.

I don't know what I was thinking because when we got to the ER we were immediately told that the poison control contacted them and told them what meds she could have swallowed and were informed that we will not just be there for the afternoon (mind you this is at 9:30 in the morning), but we will be staying the night, in the ICU.

They wanted to monitor her closely for 24 hours. The meds she took could cause her heart to misfire and/or her blood presser to drop.

Oh, joy. Maybe this experience will teach haddie not to be so noisy. WRONG!!

Although the heart monitors and the IV were uncomfortable and even hurtful. I think she enjoyed her experience far too much. She had many visitors two of which are her good friends. with the visitors come gifts and food. Even though she had to stay in the hospital bed, she was the center of attention and enjoyed charming all the doctors and nurses.

Durning the night her blood presser did drop to a uncomfortable 38, but went back up with no other problems. We were released the next morning with no farther instructions, that is other then KEEP your meds hidden and out of reach. Which is what we were doing, she is just very clever. Oh, and the caps are not child proof, they are child resistant, just to let you know. The poison control lady told me that MOST 2 yr olds can get into them. Which is funny because most other cannot.

A renewed passion

Okay, so this has been a long time passion of mine that has resurfaced. God has been tweeking my heart a lot about this issue lately. So much so that it has kept me up most nights. I am still figuring out what can be done. That is other then prayer.

Well, I guess I shall tell you what I am talking about.

A few weeks ago, I was talking to a friend and she was telling me some things her boys are struggling with at High school. One of which is with girls. This struggle caught me by surprise. I am not sure if it is because I didn't want to think that it was this bad or because I really didn't know. I never went to public school so I couldn't tell you if they did this when I was in high school or not. If they did it at my school, I wasn't aware. I was very naive, or still am, so I could have been clueless. But anyway, this friend proceeded to tell me that her boys were getting texts from girls who wanted to do them favors... sexual favors. I was shocked beyond belief.

I listened as the others shared similar concerns about the girls at the high school, and I tired very hard to hide my surprised face (which is nearly impossible for me). One story was of a girl who asked if her boyfriend could stay the night, her mother said "yes" so she asked her boyfriend. Who asked his mom. Luckily this mother is a wonderful mother, who replied "Are you kidding me, of course you can not!" She then took that opportunity to talk to her son about respecting girls and choosing wisely who he dates.

I could not believe all these stories I was hearing. My heart was broken. I began to cry. These poor girls, do they not realize how precious they are. Have they never been taught to respect themselves and to not throw themselves at just anyone? Where are these girls mothers and fathers, why are they not protecting them?

Also, these poor boys. They have not a chance. Girls are throwing themselves at them, offering favors and more. What hormonal teenage boy could say no? not many.

This began to eat at me more and more. The protective mother in me came out and I began to respond with anger, which I know is not the right action, but it ate at me. I began to think of my poor girls and how I want to protect them. I began to think of my future son (that I hope to have). I prayed and prayed for these girls and that I could channel this passion into love and for God to teach me how to love these girls.

Just the other day I went to a park across the high school. It was such a pretty day, perfect for going to the park. This park has swings and lower toys perfect for Haddie to play on. No one was there, I thought this was a perfect day and weird no one took advantage of the day. There was the park manager, cleaning and attending. There was also a man sitting on a bench drinking a pop, but he was just sitting there, looking as if he was waiting for something. I kept my eye on him as my little girl played. right at 11:00, the park manager quickly through his stuff in the van and drove swiftly away.

"In a hurry to go to lunch." I thought.

The other man started walking toward the play area, my heart started pounding, but he walked past where haddie was playing, up to a table where a girl had arrived (obviously from the high school). He greeted her with a kiss and a inappropriate touch. shocked I turned and tried to ignore the on going inappropriate scene to the left of me. With in minutes the park was full of high schoolers out for lunch. We were surrounded, but this was not what made me the most uncomfortable. It was the language being said, the PDA that every couple began to do, and the smoking that too young of kids started. I was horrified, by all that was going on. They had no respect for me or my girls. They noticed me alright and even commented on my cute kids. One girl who was right behind me began telling her friends a story using such language, I blushed. I turned and politely asked her to not use such language. She did apologize, for that I was pleasantly surprised. I immediately got up and tried to convince haddie to get off the play set. While bribing Haddie, two girls and a boy passed me talking.

One of the girls saying, "What if my mom is home, what do I say to her about your boyfriend.? Do I tell her I am not sure if he's your boyfriend?"

Once I finally got home, I cried. Also, swore to myself that Haddie and Eden are never going to that school. I was also out raged that these kids were set free to do whatever they liked during lunch. Where is a supervisor. These kids left alone, not having been taught what is right, will obviously do what is wrong, or whatever feels good to them.

Frustrated, I called the school. This is what they told me: "We have open lunch, we can not do anything if they are off the school property. We do have a police officer who drives by the park periodically. I will let them know they were miss behaving."

My anger boiled. OPEN LUNCH! They are crazy! Obviously these kids are not responsible enough and should not have open lunch anymore. Also these kids are directly across the street from the HS. You could look out the windows of the HS and see all that was going on, yet NOTHING could be done.

I called my mom to vent my frustration. She calmed me down and reminded me to channel my passion back to love. Love... it is because of love that I am passionate about these kids. Love... yet for some reason it is easier to respond in anger then in Love. I do love these kids, this is why I wanted to be in youth ministry. It is because of the lack of true love that these kids do not know better.

I want something to be done. I want these girls to know that they are worth so much more then their bodies. I want them to know their value, so that they will not find their value in boys or sexual favors. I want them to know God, and his love for them. I want them to choose a life that is the best for them, one living in the presence of God. A life that gives them meaning, true pleasure, and worth. This is my renewed passion.

Snow

I finally have time to blog...

Phew, it has been a long week. But exciting non the less.

We are back at home and trying to get back into the swing of things.

Last week was an entertaining week. We got stuck in Oklahoma, no complaints from me, but a few from Paul. We were suppose to return to Colorado on Tuesday, but a blizzard in Oklahoma snowed us in. Yes, a blizzard in Oklahoma, you read that right. It dumped 8 inches and up to 20 inches in some other places. But the worst part was the snow drifts which got up to 5 ft in some

areas. Oklahoma was basically closed down for a few days. Even Walmart closed.

Needless to say, our flight was canceled. So we re-scheduled for Wednesday, and that too was canceled. We finally got a flight out for Thursday night. The one problem then was the roads. They were terrible to drive on especially with the rented car that only had rear wheel drive. We barely made it over to Paul's parents from my parents house, much less make it safely to Tulsa's airport 45 min away.

Luckly, a friend of my family, offered to drive us to the airport, who had four wheel drive. But it still proved to be a long journey, taking us 2 hours. We differently would not have made it without four wheel drive.

We flew out with only a few minutes of a delay, and made it into Denver. It fairly late because of time change and we still had a 2 hour drive home, arriving to Canon city around 1:00 am, 2:00 am Ok time.

The next day was a crazy one for Paul. He had to leave for winter retreat at 3:00 that afternoon. So when the girls and I got all ready we went to the church to help Paul with any last minute jobs he needed done for the retreat.

Paul, got back from a fantastic weekend with the kids on Sunday afternoon. He fit in a short nap before we went off to a Super Bowl party at a friends. Getting in late again we relaxed all day Monday. Then that night we went to a movie with some friends. We saw Sanctum, I would not suggest it. I hate movies like that... I like to leave movies feeling inspired or at least with some good feeling. I didn't leave that movie feeling anything good. But it was a well made movie, I will give it that.

Tuesday, The church office was closed due to snow, but Paul still had to work, so he locked himself in the bedroom to escape from a curious little girl who loves her Daddy. It snowed all day and was beautiful. But, it didn't keep us from going to see Spamelot in Co. Springs with some other friends. Awesome, show! It was a very funny show. I enjoyed it tremendously, something about being at a live show.

I love the theatre! It makes me want to be on stage.

Today, was a fairly normal day, and it looks like we will be getting back to the swing of things soon. However, Paul and I hope to improve how we swing things. But, I will save that for a later post... "Improving life skills"

Pic, I stole from someone at JBU.